Beauty

i don’t really want to get into the subject of wives submitting to husbands, or women submitting to men in the context of church leadership, but it has been on my mind lately…so here you go. Consider this from Peter:  “For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to make themselves beautiful.  They were submissive to their own husbands, like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her master.  You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear.”

They made themselves beautiful by submitting to their husbands.

Sarah, the example, obeyed Abraham and called him her master.  She did what was right and did not give way to fear.

We should do the same.  End of story.

Wow.  Talk about unpopular.  This may be the least “shared” blog in the (short) history of blogging.  O well…here i am…not giving way to fear  .

While i could fill a lot of space with commentary on these verses, what strikes me every time i read them is Peter’s use of Sarah as the trendsetter of submission.  This was Holy Spirit-inspired genius.  Why?  Because no woman could “story top” Sarah’s adventurous marriage to Abraham.

Abraham was a man of great faith.  He was, after all, the father of a nation.  He is best known as the father of Isaac, the uncle of Lot, the one with whom God covenanted great blessing.  He was what we might call a “rock star” on the stage of Christian History.  Being married to him might have been like being married to Billy Graham (sorry Ruth).

But he is also the man who sent his bride into the harem of a king.  Twice.  Genesis 12 and Genesis 20 each recount Abraham’s fearful response as first an Egyptian pharaoh and then a neighboring king were enamored with the beauty of Sarah.  Both times, Abraham instructed Sarah to lie in order to protect himself…and both times she obeyed…and both times she was taken into the king’s household under false pretense.  Can you imagine????

And both times, God protected her.

Sarah obeyed Abraham.  She did not give way to fear.  She put her hope in God.  And God was faithful.

This is not a commentary on the actions of Abraham.  Clearly, God’s faithful care of Sarah does not mitigate his sin.  What’s important to note is Sarah’s trust --- not in Abraham, but in God.  Abraham would fail her.  But God would not.  Sarah knew that her responsibility was to put her hope in God, submit to the leadership of the man that God had given her, and wait.

In my sanctified imagination, i do wonder what kind of conversation precipitated Sarah’s obedience.  Surely she had some discussion with her husband about this strategy (especially the second time).  But i can’t imagine that their interaction resembled the sitcom marriages that we are so familiar with today…i don’t expect that Sarah ridiculed and belittled Abraham.  i know this because, in the end, she chose to submit to his plan.

And GOD did not fail.

Sisters, i know i’m treading on thin ice here.  i’m not advocating participating in sin.*  i don’t understand all of what happened in this ancient scenario.  i do not know WHAT ABRAHAM WAS THINKING or why God allowed this particular chain of events.  But i do know that the principles taken from God’s care of Sarah are applicable to our lives.

When i resist submitting to my husband (i know...you are stunned by that admission) --- or to my church leadership --- it’s mostly because i am afraid that he is wrong, and i (or someone i love) will suffer the consequences of his wrong-ness.  And the truth is that sometimes he is wrong.  And, sometimes, we do suffer.

But here’s what i know is always true:  God never fails me.  Never.  Even in my suffering, and in the suffering of those i love.  Even in the consequences of a not-so-great decision.

God has given me a husband who is not perfect. He is such a great man, but he is not perfect.  What i hang onto from Peter’s text is that i don’t have to 1) manage his imperfection or 2) be afraid of his failure.  i don't have to be passive aggressive...or manipulative.  i don't have to say "i told you so".  He can not be perfect and occasionally not be right and i do not have to be afraid.  i can honor him, obey him, and put my hope in God.

i think it’s interesting that Sarah is described in these Genesis passages as “a very beautiful woman”.  She certainly caught the eye of the royals in her day.  But i wonder if her beauty was genetic, or were these men seeing the beauty described by Peter?  The beauty of courageous submission.  Of hopeful confidence in God.  Of quiet, gentle strength.

In one week, my daughter will be married to a less-than-perfect-but-oh-so-awesome young man.  She has not had a very good example in me...but i'm trusting the Lord to grow her up into a woman like Sarah.  My prayer for her as a new bride is that she will put her hope in God.  Do what is right.  Not give way to fear.  She'll never make the cover of Vanity Fair, but her faith will flourish and her husband will be blessed.  Amen?



AN IMPORTANT NOTE!
*If you are being pressured to participate in sin, please seek wise counsel from a godly woman, a pastor or an elder!  Abraham and Sarah did not have the benefit of a church family...of community...to help them in these difficult and dicey circumstances.

Another important note...lesser, but important:
Sarah was also less-than-perfect.  Perhaps you will recall the sarcasm of her response to God's promise of a baby boy.  Just a sidebar.